• Simon Truckle

Mel Morris and the Time Machine

Updated: Nov 19, 2021

It’s Mel bashing season!

He’s destroyed our club, He’s a fraud, He hated us all along… He ate my hamster.

For the narrative to be entirely true it relies on two key planks.

1. Mel is a bit stupid

2. He wilfully damaged an asset he owned

Given that the historical record suggests that he is quite clever and rather fond of his local club I'd say neither are true. Where he has massively failed and can be fully criticised is in not having the foresight to build a time machine.

When Derby submitted their financial figures to the EFL on 30th June 2016 it was based on a new amortisation process. As the EFL signed-off on those figures Mel based his future spending plans on how much he could put into the club while staying within FFP using that method. He funded the club on this basis for the next 3 years, without a murmur from the EFL.

Let’s say that the EFL had been even half-way competent – it’s a stretch I know, but bear with me – and had said on the 30th of June 2016.

“Mr Morris, we don’t think you should amortise in this way, can you resubmit using the previous method?”

What do you think he would have done? Anyone think, he might have said.

“Right you are, I’ll change my plans accordingly”

And over the next couple of years sold Tom Laurence and not bought Krystian Beilik.

Given that the EFL figures suggest we have overspent by, at the most £17m over a 4-year period I’d say that would have been enough, and if it wasn’t he would have sold someone else because, once again, he is neither stupid nor intent on fatally damaging an asset he owns.

His crime would seem to be an inability to predict in 2016 that 3 years later the EFL would change their mind and retrospectively change the rules. While he was at it, he could also have built a Tardis, predicted a global pandemic, and every Friday’s Euro Millions numbers. Just our luck, we got saddled with a generous local businessman when we needed the love-child of Mystic Meg and Nostradamus.

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